LRB News ! - Issue #11

 The Dust has Settled...

Well, some weeks have passed since the very first running of L'enfer du Nord - The Hell of the North - Launceston Roobaix.  

Here at LRB News! time has passed quickly while basking in the smug and self-satisfied glow of what can only be described as an unparalleled success !  However, the time has ( finally ) arrived to recap the day, and reflect on a few of the stories.  There is also the not-so-small matter of the coveted LRB trophy to be awarded.

But lets not get ahead of events.  Sit back while we relive the morning... 

A strong field gathered in unseasonably warm conditions in Civic Square - well, most of us Ben and Wes - just as the rolling tones of the town clock faded away at the appointed count of 10.  Wonderful timing.  Of the exclusive invitational start list, there was only one true scratching - Steven unable to make the start due to illness.  Of particular note Craig B stunned the gathered starters with a very flash all-carbon entry, but then admitted that he was really on the way home from his regular morning bunch ride, and needed to leave LRB at the half-way point to attend to family business. While sorry to lose you from the ride Craig, there was some marked relief amongst the group at not having to sprint against you at the finish.

This inaugural LRB was someting of a first big reunion on wheels for a number of old warriors, and a welcome to the fold for some new faces.  Both Gav's ( who had not met before ) carried off the mountain-man and/or silver-fox beard to perfection.  Darren made an early bid for bonus points with a steed that was both stolen from his brother's shed, and colour matched to the organisers jersey - crafty and shameless in one ( How did he know - Ed ? ).  Craig's timeless and classy Team Cinzano colours were a fitting bookend for Simon's fluro tradies vest, while Steve basked in the unmarked 80's uniqueness of his aero National and pristine white riding shoes.  Amongst this star-studded line-up the LRB entry seemed somewhat subdued, enlivened only by the fashion coup/travesty of authentic 90's denim print Carerra bibs ( and over-socks )...

A small but classy group, the gathering brought a bold splash of colour to Launceston's Civic Square, beautifully offsetting the pristine white neo-classical town hall and brutalist off-form concrete of the local bureauocratic headquaters.   A deep-voiced buzz of good humour played soundtrack to riders busying themselves with signing autographs, chatting with well-wishers and having photo's taken, re-arranging pockets, sizing up the assembled machines, or dashing off for a last-minute weight reduction.  

 

With a brief outline of proceedings for the morning out of the way, the group rolled into the neutralised zone through the CBD, admiring glances following at every turn.  A poorly timed first traffic light caused an initial split, but as the field regrouped at Princes Square, Wes slipped into the fold - close enough, and better late than never. 

It was just after an envious cry of "...there go the retro boys..." was heard from the Charles St cafe racers that an unfortunate but well-timed puncture brought Craig - and subsequently the rest of the field - to a stop within metres of the end of the neutral zone.  Now it is rumoured that small sections of another rider's bar tape helped to bridge the gaps left by an antiquated rim tape (  Is it still in there? - Ed ), but in only the time it takes to weather a good ribbing from a group champing at the bit to get under way, the repair was sorted and the drag up to 5-ways dispatched.  From then on, sectors rolled too quickly under the wheels.  

The late inclusion of the new Sector 1 proved a fitting introduction to the rough stuff, bringing on both a crunching of gravel, of gears, and some frantic braking action on unexpectedly hidden and steep gravel pinches, closely followed by a turbo-chook and BBQ slalom and slippery bridge run back to the main road.  

Sector 2 flashed by quickly, leading into leafy backstreets and some reminiscing over childhood memories of the Show Grounds now made over into suburbia.  It was during this quiet interlude that Gav lowered his guard after some deserved bike-paint-job-flattery, to divulge that his custom-made stickers ( and very nice Martini colours too - Ed ) might have cost many times more than his entire bike build...

A pause due to traffic ( where were they all going ? ) pre-empted Sector 3 with a chance to catch a breath and prepare for the lengthy run into a block headwind on top of the North-Esk river levy.  A brief turn of speed ( 'Always attack into the wind' - E. Merckx ) split the numbers momentarily just before Heritage Forest, but all closed together again for a grin-inducing loop through the dirt-jump park, and then some minor navigational confusion finding the exit gate...

An alleged Batman-on-scooter sighting by the Race Course pre-empted bush back blocks and the odd burnt out car hulk for Sector 4, closely followed by a quick run down hill to UTAS Newnham campus.  Having repaired his slipping gear issues on the fly by mindfully missing the stem mounted gear changer with his knee while pedalling, Simon ( later admitted that he ) maxxed his fear-o-meter with a swooping high-speed TipShopBike-brakeless run into Newnham - hoping that he wouldn't take out the field like ninepins as they stood waiting to turn at the campus entry traffic lights.  

Heading into the closing stages of the ride, and having turned with a freshening tail-wind, the city's levy-top bike path snake-run connected to a zig and a zag through industrial back blocks to the water front.  This confusing switch back and forth to the Tamar River edge proved the ideal launching pad for a well timed and major dig by Gav K through a round-about - while everyone tried to work out which way to go.  Unfortunately he was headed in the wrong direction and off-course...  

Through Sector 5, a mix of gravel, asphalt, and cyclocross-style barriers, the field gathered up again and and remained on high alert for a late attack.  The tricky Rowing Club turn past Bunnings was completed into Invermay-proper, the pace quickened, the banter died away, and all focus switched to the finishing sprint on the old velodrome site.  Rough road base, gravel, bouncing chains, and a front flat for the LRB entry ( that's our excuse ) marked the final sprint - and with a late charge Wes drew alongside Gav H who, as predicted, was left on the front to lead out.  The finish could not have been closer, and deemed a dead heat with front wheels inseperable in the photo-finish.

And so the very first running of LRB drew to a close-fought finish - an epic sprint for the ages under gathering clouds - a clear winner impossible to pick.  No falls, no broken bikes, unfortunatley no mud, and only a spattering spit of rain and Craig's puncture to mar the morning atmosphere.  Whew.

Aside from the almost perfect conditions for the start of the ride - leg warmers relegated to the back pocket - the abiding memory of the day for the LRB News! crew was the humming/murmuring sound of the peloton as it rolled together in a tight-knit group, lost in the midst of various conversations - among both old friends and new aquaintences.

There was also the intriguingly rumoured rogue Scooter-Batman sightings at various points on course.  Somewhat like the pink Sasquatch who appears unexpectedly in a Dirt Every Day episode, Scooter-Batman remained an enimatic figure during the ride, unsubstantiated with actual photographic evidence.  More would be revealed come the post-event BBQ...

This is all very well, we hear you call from your various living rooms, but who won the coveted LRB trophy ?  

Well, weighing up and counting the points has taken considerable effort and is the reason it has taken so long to bring you this report.  It has been an extremely tight points count, requiring many tortured and late nights of consideration before landing on a winner...

As the suspense builds, tune in for the next and final issue of LRB News! for a full and frank points review and analysis.  The LRB trophy will be awarded !